Surviving infidelity really is possible if both parties in the relationship or marriage definitely want to and are prepared to work at it.

The even better news is that a lot of couples don't just succeed in surviving infidelity, but in creating a new relationship together which is even stronger than before.

To have the best possible chance of surviving infidelity you need to be aware of the following Do's and Don'ts:

The Do's of surviving infidelity

1. Do make sure the affair is completely over

2. Do take time out initially to work out exactly what you want both individually, then as a couple

3. Do be honest. It probably won't work long term if you resolve to stay in your relationship or marriage when that's not what you really want, say for the sake of the children or for financial reasons.

4. Do be sensitive to your partner's emotions and moods. This is particularly relevant if you're the one who cheated.

5. Do start communicating. Talk through together what was missing from your relationship or marriage and what you need to put back into it for it to work next time round.

The Don'ts of surviving infidelity

1. Don't try to resolve anything whilst you're on the initial emotional rollercoaster. Let things settle down first.

2. Don't blame your partner for everything, irrespective of whether you're the cheated or the cheating partner. Be prepared to take your share of responsibility for what happened.

3. Don't shout and scream at each other as this won't get you anywhere. If it gets to that point agree to leave the discussion for another time when you are both calmer.

4. Don't expect a quick fix. You need to continually work at your relationship or marriage, particularly if it has been severely tested.